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Monday, June 1, 2015

Newsroom Humor: The Visual Nut!

The news editor was in a very disturbed state of mind that evening. He was new to the newsroom of the television channel, its surroundings, and that made it all the more irritating. It was in the most biting phase of the winter and his newsroom pals seemed to be more interested in sitting cosily closer to their burning warm electric heaters chattily chewing betel nuts than anything else. There was the onset of a threatening lethargy that the hapless news editor tried to resist with all his might. He had to ensure that the most important story of that day got included in the bulletins.

The story was written and ready, but somehow the visuals were eluding everyone. Again and again, the tape was inserted in the video editing machines and checked. No visuals emerged on the monitors. What happened? Furious, the news editor wanted to know. The camera unit was there for the coverage and stayed there full length of the event. Then?

The editor called the concerned executive for explanations. The fellow came in with a benign smile busy chewing a mouthful of betel nut and paan. As the editor started questioning the smile transformed into a grin and his chewing hardly stopped.

“Why there are no visuals?”
“Well, Sir, you see…we tried and tried. But no visuals…!”
“But how could it happen? The cameraman was there all the time with his camera.”
“Sir you see…he is the only cameraman here…lots of pressure…for everything he is the only…”
“But he was there with the camera. The visuals had to be there.”
“…He is also lonely here…no family…no good food…many many problems…!”
“But what happened to the visuals?”
“Sir, I asked the poor guy…he forgot to press the record button sir…he is so hard pressed…!”
“O’ my God! He did not need to press it so hard I suppose! How much strength does the poor starving guy require for that exercise?”


The executive broke into a broad grin and started chewing vigorously. The editor looked into the barren ceiling above fearing a rain of betel nuts falling on him and submerging him…
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