The Peculiar Utility Of The Reverse Emotions!
One day both of you wake up
very late and go about your morning business rather in a lazy way, albeit with
a guilty feeling. Now, in most of the households the aspect of the utmost
importance would always be ‘who will have the privilege of using the bathroom
first’, and this depends entirely on your spouse. You or anyone of the members
can avail of the opportunity only when she issues the permit. That day she
gives you the green signal to bathe first, and in a happy state of mood you
prepare yourself for the privilege. The moment you’re ready putting the towel
around you lower half and about to head for the bathroom your spouse appears
with something on her hands and says she has a little piece of business of to
do in the bathroom telling you to wait a bit. You do wait, sitting down on a
chair.
After about ten minutes you
get a little doubtful and approach the closed bathroom door inquiring politely,
‘are you taking a bath?’ to which she says ‘no’. You return to your chair with
the towel still around your lower half. More than twenty minutes elapse, and
you become impatient, hungry and even angry now. Then she comes out saying that
she decided to take the bath due to so and so reasons. You show your emotions
continuing to sit on the chair, with the towel around your lower half. Now, she
gets angry at your indifference to her generosity and blames you with baseless
charges as to why you’ve not gone there immediately. You obviously get genuinely
angry now; you get rid of the towel, put on your shorts and start preparing
breakfast for yourself, being very hungry. Hell breaks loose: her nagging and
your unavoidable retorts justifying your action that you had no ulterior
motives. Your spouse is not in a mood to relent and the morning is almost
spoilt. In such a situation the ‘reversing of emotions’ process comes good: you
wear a broad smile or a fixed grin while sitting on chair muttering not a
syllable, and the moment she comes out you go in smilingly and silently. The morning
and eventually the day are saved for you.
Another fine morning you wake
up in the normal hour and go about your morning business in good spirit. Your spouse
informs you that as she has some work in the afternoon the lunch will be early,
and tells you to take a light breakfast. You obey most amiably. After that ‘light’
breakfast your spouse sits on the bed talking on her mobile phone. And, she
goes on talking for hours, apparently forgetting the ‘the early lunch command’,
and you find yourself waiting indefinitely, hunger making you desperate. You
somehow manage with one or two visits to the kitchen taking a mouthful of dry
fruits or nuts or biscuits. When it becomes intolerable you say to her, still
busy talking, rather a bit loudly, ‘you promised early lunch, and now have me
tortured by hunger. If you cannot, allow me to cook myself…’ And obviously hell
breaks loose again. You can avoid this easily adopting the ‘reversing of
emotions’ process—doing your work with broad smile or a fixed grin and saying
absolutely nothing, ignoring the growing pangs of hunger like a spiritualist;
because peace and bliss is the priority.
Both of you have to keep an
important appointment that day, and you told your spouse much in advance to get
ready at the appropriate hour without fail. As it happens with most wives, she
gets late and even the hour by which you are supposed to arrive at your destination
passes. Her casual and indifferent ways infuriate you further. However, in this
situation you’re already following this nonentity’s advice: waiting patiently
and remaining absolutely silent, not able to display the recommended broad
smile or the fixed grin though. You’re only a human being. You cannot help long
impatient breaths escaping your lungs and muttering extremely softly, monosyllables
like ‘oh my God!’ kind of things. Even these catch the attentive ears of your
spouse and all hell threatens to break out again. So, you understand the
peculiar utility of following the ‘reversing of emotions’ process in its
entirety.
Right or wrong and
reasonable or unreasonable arguments hardly matter in the matters of a happy conjugal
life. You accept the wrong gleefully if your spouse says so, and your ‘right’
is never accepted easily which fact you must surrender yourself to. If you say
her wrong as ‘wrong’ clearly it’ll work as a trigger to erupt her like a
volcano; never dormant, you must understand that too. You see, all for everlasting
conjugal happiness and bliss. However, this is not the general picture. On many
occasions you spouse reverts to your ‘right’ sometime later making you ecstatic
and vindicated; however, you’ll help yourself better by not displaying these
emotions too openly. It is also imperative for you to be a perfect listener
which you probably are in workplace. When you spouse is in an expansive mood
and launches into a long soliloquy you must continue to listen in the most
alert position—never interrupting her, neither getting up or moving around and nor
fiddling with your mobile phone irrespective of ennui or similar feelings you
may have encountered in the process.
Of course, you must
understand your better half taking into account all the circumstances of the household
and outside of it that can affect her invariably. In recent times the pandemic
and the frequent lockdowns are making your spouse a prisoner in the kitchen
with no outings or food parcels from her favorite restaurants, and all these
easily make most of the wives stressed beyond measure and irritated all the
time. You must understand your better half much more than you understand yourself.
If you want to help her in the kitchen which you must, do it as per her wish,
and taking absolute care that nothing in the kitchen gets displaced or the
floor gets dirty, even if it was a spilling of a few drops of water. You’re
bound to make mistakes in jobs you’re not used to, and therefore, whenever you
make mistakes undo these immediately before you spouse comes to know. And,
always keep in mind the ‘reversing’ formula.
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